


The Goats of Brooklyn

by R_squared



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Bickering, Brooklyn, Canon Divergence, Domestic Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Established Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Established Relationship, Goat Herder Bucky Barnes, Humor, M/M, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), let's assume we won
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-21
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-06-30 14:29:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15753603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/R_squared/pseuds/R_squared
Summary: Bucky isn't the only one adjusting to life in a city again.You didn't have anywhere to be today, right?





	The Goats of Brooklyn

**Author's Note:**

> ENTIRELY based off this phenomenal tweet from NYCT Subway today: [Tweet Here!](https://twitter.com/NYCTSubway/status/1031562440251793409)
> 
> I laughed my ass off reading that this actually happened today so I couldn't help myself.  
> Few notes:  
> Lets assume we one in IW and Steve and Bucky moved back to Brooklyn.  
> Let's also assume for the sake of this that they have a small, potentially shared outside space.  
> Please forgive me for any other omissions but let's just leave this as the little bit of fun it is. :)
> 
> Enjoy!

It had been a quiet day, Bucky was lazing on the couch reading a book while Steve painted in his studio when something on the radio caught his attention. He reached over and turned it up just a little, eyes going wide as he started piecing the information together. Shutting it off he hurried across the room to look out the window. “Fuck.” He muttered before frantically unplugging every electronic device they had in an attempt to news proof the apartment. All the while he kept one ear honed on Steves movements which had so far been silent. 

He made it as far as unlocking the front door before that changed.

“Hey Buck.” He winced as Steve appeared, leaning on the hallway door frame.

“Hey, we’re out of eggs, I’ll be back soon.” He responded, making a break for it.

“ _Bucky._ ”

Shit. That was Steve’s stern voice, Bucky was so screwed.

“Y’know you sound like your ma whe-” 

Steve held his phone out and Buckys gut dropped as he read the news headline on the screen. 

**_Two goats found roaming N train tracks in Brooklyn_ **

Fucking internet. 

“So I was thinking of heading into the city today but it looks like the trains might not be running on time.” 

“Woah, weird.” 

“ **Bucky** , your kids are terrorising Brooklyn!”

“Those could be anyone's goats!” He scrambled.

Steve rolled his eyes with such force he wasn’t sure they’d ever come back out of his skull. “Oh come on, how many people do you think actually own goats around here? I’ll tell you, none. ‘Cause most people are able to convince their boyfriends **not** to adopt goats.” 

“What do you want from me? They’re from Wakanda Steve, they don’t like the apartment.” He folded his arms across his chest defensively.

“I only planned on their being two of us when I bought the place Buck.” Steve started tugging on a pair of sneakers as they bickered.

“There was enough space for us both at my old place.”

“It was a mud hut!”

“At least it had land!”

“For the love of-, I swear I will drop you all back in Wakanda.” Steve muttered to himself as he walked passed Bucky and out the door, “Let you be Shuri’s problem.”

“Hey! You jumped out of a plane without a parachute pal, don’t try and tell me who the problem is here.” 

When they arrived at the scene a few scattered police were doing their best to herd the animals to no avail. Their wide spread arms and yelling from all directions only caused the goats to behave erratically in the confusion.

“Stop you’re scaring them!” Bucky called, jumping the small fence and jogging towards the tracks.

Steve was hot on his heels, assessing the situation.

A nearby photographer who had been capturing the scene was quick to shift his focus. Goats on the train tracks were one thing, but goats on the train tracks that required Captain Americas attention would easily make the front page of tomorrows gossip magazines. 

“Captain Rogers, Captain Rogers! What are you doing here?” He called.

“Kid. I’m asking myself the same question.”

Bucky shot him an epic bitchface over his shoulder before focusing back on the task at hand. The police took a few steps back, lowing their hands and Bucky could see his two adopted kids immediately become more at ease.

“Do you want us to tranq them?” An officer called.

“Don’t even think about it.” Bucky slowly made his way across the tracks, making a few low clicking sounds to get their attention. “Hi there kiddo, what ya doing so far from home?” He pulled an apple from his pocket to offer them. “Did you and Steve go for an adventure?” He spoke softly, his voice soothing their frayed nerves.

The real life human Steve shook his head, a hand covering the embarrassment on his face. That was definitely making it onto the internet.

Bucky crouched down, letting them close the last of the distance. He stroked down the back of their necks as they crunched the apples enthusiastically. After a few minutes he ushered Steve over with a wave.

“Now what? I forgot to bring.. Uh- do goats have leashes?” Steve asked, scratching his head.

“They’re kids Steve, how else do you get a lost kid home?”

He chuckled at the blank look on Steves face. He clearly didn’t know where this was going. Bucky scooped up the first goat and dumped him unceremoniously into Steves arms. Steve fumbled with the squirming beast much to Buckys amusement but once he had it under control Steve began to laugh, a smile replacing the scowl on his face. 

After apologising profusely and thanking everyone for their assistance the two hurried back out onto the street. They walked the few blocks home as quickly as they could but any hope of staying inconspicuous pretty much goes out the window when you’re two super soldiers carrying bleating goats through the streets of Brooklyn.

Once the goats were safely back in their small gated yard, Steve let out a long sigh. “Well that certainly was something.” He felt arms tentatively wrap around his waist and relaxed into the embrace. 

“You’re not too mad, are ya?” Bucky asked, resting his head along the crook of his partners neck.

“Not if you fix that damn gate I won’t be.” He scolded with a smile.

It wasn't long before their phones began to vibrate. Steve fished his from his pocket, scrolling through the multiple messages as Bucky read over his shoulder.

**Nat:**  
_Congratulations, you're trending on Twitter._

She had attached an image of the two of them, arms full of fur and smiles wide as one of the goats bleated towards to camera dramatically. They both burst into laughter at the sight.

"We're getting that framed."

"Why? So that when we're fighting you have physical proof that I'm an idiot?" 

"Exactly." He turned to place a loving kiss on Buckys lips before going back to watching the goats who seemed totally unaffected by the days drama.


End file.
